A Letter to my Father.

Dear Charles, A lot has happened in the year since you’ve left. Mostly I think about what life would be like if you weren’t gone and realize how much time I took for granted while you still were. I got a tattoo of you in March and I know you never loved that I had tattoos, but I think even you would appreciate this one. I turned 30 this year and I had the best birthday of my life. If you had been here, it would’ve been perfect. I got surgery on my leg because you constantly told me to take care of myself. I took mom out to see Engelbert and she told me it was the first time she could remember being happy in a long time. While I’ve been having some great moments, I have more dark days than I’d like to admit. This year, I fell into the worst depression I’ve ever had. It has been a struggle to maintain some sense of normalcy and I wonder if I will ever actually be okay again. Last month, I forgot you were gone and thought to call you, but then it hit me that I couldn’t and it felt like ice. I have a hard time remembering simple things and I forget a lot, too. Today has been one whole year since you’ve been gone. I wondered how I would make it through a year, but I know that if you could talk to me right now, you’d tell me I’m a fool because I have let my sadness stop me from living. In The Dark Knight, Alfred reminds Bruce to endure and that’s what I have to do, even if I don’t want to. You always told me to live and adventure. We can get more of everything except time and I know you always wanted me to make the most of mine. In your memory, I swear I’m going to. Where are you, dad? I wish you were here to eat all of the candy we’d collect that we didn’t want aka all of mine that had nuts, but this is the first of many reunions on this day, in some way, each and every year. Come visit me tonight when the veil between the two worlds blurs. My eyes and heart are open to you. Happy Halloween, Dadalooie.

Petyr!

Matt Benyo has been begging me to make art. We spend all year looking forward to Drawlloween, but I lost my spark. I had no motivation to do much of anything; much less art. However, about a week ago, Matt and I were watching What We Do in the Shadows (and if you haven't seen it, there's no other movie I'd recommend you see more) and inspiration struck! One of the characters, Petyr, is inspired by Nosferatu and I love Nosferatu so, I took to Adobe Illustrator and created this masterpiece. That's a bold word to use, but I truly believe this is one of the greatest pieces I have ever created. I am so proud of it! The last image is the underlying lines used in illustrator to create it. It's nuts! I'm going to try to make some more October pieces. Check it out and click to enlarge to really appreciate the shapes and details!

Batman!

I made a mixed media birthday card for a friend. It's of Batman. It was the first time I sat down to do anything since the board I made for my Joy friends and it was hard. It was really hard, actually. I have felt creatively stifled, but I used my hands and painted some bristol board, cut it up, and made this card. It didn't come out the way I wanted it to, but I don't hate it either. Here's to some upcoming work, though.